Overcoming Failure: From 'You Suck' to Success E11
- Lisa Schoenthal
- Mar 27
- 3 min read
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What if everything you’ve been taught about failure is wrong? What if failure isn’t the end—it’s actually the launchpad to your greatest successes?
Most of us see failure as something to avoid at all costs. We fear the judgment, the disappointment, the dreaded “what ifs.” But here’s the truth: failure isn’t your enemy—it’s your secret sidekick, waiting to help you rise.
I've had my fair share of wipeouts. What I’ve learned is this: failure isn't the opposite of success—it’s part of the path. It's feedback, a divine detour guiding us somewhere better.
💔 When My Greatest Failure Became My Greatest Gift
If you’ve read my book, The Men We Meet, you might think, “Wow, she’s had a lot of love fails.” But here’s what I believe: none of the people I’ve loved were failures. They were meaningful connections that helped me grow. Still, at the time, the end of my marriage hit like the ultimate crash-and-burn.
Tom was a great man—everything “right” on paper. We loved each other deeply, and yet… it ended. Not because we didn’t care, but because we wanted different things. That shattered my sense of success. I thought something must be broken in me.
Through counseling, heartbreak, and some serious soul-searching, I realized this: letting go was an act of love. It allowed us both to grow in our own ways. We’re still close. We still care. That “failure” was one of my greatest gifts.
Can you see a moment in your life where a failure became a turning point?
🔥 How to Turn Failure into Fuel
Here are five mindset shifts and tools to help you transform failure into fierce momentum:
1. Shift from Judgment to Curiosity
Instead of beating yourself up, get curious. Ask:
What did I learn?
What’s the lesson here?
How can I grow from this?
Be your own best friend. Offer yourself grace. Growth doesn’t happen in shame—it happens in curiosity.
2. Love vs. Fear of Failure
Fear screams: “You’re not good enough.”Love whispers: “Keep going. You’re already worthy.”
Fear of failure is really fear of what failure means—that you’re not lovable, capable, or enough. But love reminds you: failing doesn’t make you a failure. It makes you brave enough to try.
Ask yourself:
What would love have me do right now?
What if this “failure” is setting me up for something better?
3. Feel the Failure and Do It Anyway
Where does the fear live in your body? Your chest? Shoulders? Stomach?
Notice it. Breathe into it. Then move forward anyway.
Fear might be riding shotgun—but it doesn’t get to drive.
4. Visualization: Stepping Through the Door
Picture this: You’re standing in front of a bold, mysterious door. On one side—self-doubt. On the other—freedom.
You reach out, smile, and turn the handle. You walk through with grit, grace, and a whole lot of power. You don’t tiptoe. You own your entrance.
Every time you choose to walk through that door, you step deeper into your truth.
5. Take Bold Action Now
What’s one thing you’ve been avoiding because you’re afraid to fail?
Write it down. Tell a friend. Take one step toward it—today.
Momentum doesn’t come from waiting. It comes from action.
💬 Powerful Affirmations to Support Your Journey
Repeat these. Write them. Believe them.
I attract opportunities by showing up as my true self.
I release control and trust what’s unfolding.
Every failure is guiding me toward something better.
I am magnetic to growth, joy, and success.
My setbacks are sacred invitations to rise.
I transform every challenge into a chance to evolve.
Failure is fuel—I use it to launch forward.
✨ Final Thoughts: Is Failure Your Enemy or Ally?
You get to decide. Will failure keep you stuck, or will it launch you into your next chapter?
You’re stronger than you think. And that door you’ve been afraid to walk through? It’s waiting. On the other side is everything you’re becoming.
Take the step. Say the thing. Write the book. Launch the business. Start again.
Your future self will thank you.
