Reclaiming Your Feminine Power to Restore Ease, Balance and Trust to Your Partnerships (Episode 18)

"A woman’s highest calling is to lead a man to his soul, so as to unite him with Source. Her lowest calling is to seduce, separating man from his soul and leaving him aimlessly wandering. A man’s highest calling is to protect woman, so she is free to walk the earth unharmed." Cherokee Proverb

Hey, Gorgeous Soul,

Ever feel like you’re juggling it all—work, home, relationships—while your partner just seems to be on the sidelines? I see you. The weight of the world feels like it's on your shoulders, and you're trying to carry it all, but where’s the support?

Well, today we’re diving deep into something that’s quietly shifting the way we connect, love, and show up in our relationships: the power struggle between masculine and feminine energy. If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing it all—and not getting the support you crave—this is your wake-up call.

Get ready to explore the juicy, untold truths about balance, surrender, and the sexy magic of true partnership. Grab your cuppa, because we’re about to blow the lid off everything you thought you knew about relationships. This one’s gonna light a fire.

The Historical Dance of Masculine and Feminine Energy

1.     Women in the Workforce During and After the World WarsLet’s kick things off with how women stepped into the workforce during the World Wars, taking on roles that were traditionally reserved for men. This moment in history was a big deal. When the wars ended, many women didn’t want to go back to their roles as homemakers. This shift left men feeling threatened, and a new division began to take shape.

2.     The Sexual Revolution and Financial IndependenceThen came the sexual revolution—a powerful wave of women reclaiming their independence. Along with this freedom came financial independence, as women began earning their own money and stepping into roles they had never before occupied. But with this rise in independence came some serious tension. Women were fighting for equal pay, and in doing so, they found themselves rising above men in many ways.

3.     The Rise of Hyper-Independent Women and Disconnect from MenAs women became more self-sufficient, many found themselves raising children on their own, either by choice or due to divorce. This led to a generation of hyper-independent women who believed they didn’t need men. Sons, on the other hand, grew up seeing women as strong and independent, so courtship became less appealing for them. Men began to feel disconnected from women and their roles as protectors and providers.

4.     The Shift to Physical Connection and Lack of CommitmentFast forward to today, and we’re in the age of online dating, where swiping left or right has replaced real connection. Women, empowered and financially independent, started dating younger men, often without needing or expecting commitment. But these physical-only connections started to lack substance, and as women continued to provide for themselves, they unintentionally left no space for their partners to show up as true providers.

5.     Return to Traditions and the Rise of the "Trad Wife"Feminists are going to fight this one…but it’s happening. There’s a resurgence of women wanting to embrace more traditional roles, like baking bread, gardening, raising kids and chickens!, and nurturing the home. This isn't about taking a step backward, but rather about creating a balance that honors both feminine and masculine energies. It’s a return to the basics—reconnecting with nature, community, and the deep bonds that allow true partnerships to thrive.

The Dangers of Over-Identifying with Masculine Energy & The Blame Game

Keeping in mind everything we’ve explored, things start to get really tricky here. As women, we’re naturally multitaskers—we juggle, we do it all—but somewhere along the way, we’ve started to take on more than we should. We've become so accustomed to doing it all that we unintentionally stop our partners from stepping up.

When we don’t let them lead, we end up frustrated, exhausted, and disconnected. So, how do we make a shift and start creating the kind of partnership we actually want? Let’s break it down.

Here’s where the rubber meets the road. If you’ve been carrying the load for both you and your partner, chances are, you’ve unknowingly emasculated him. I’m saying this with so much care because I want you to understand—you’re not alone, and you’re not failing. We’ve all been there. This is an epidemic!

As women, we’re great at multitasking, but when we take on everything—financial, emotional, physical—we rob our partners of their chance to contribute. When they do step up, we often criticize them for not doing it "our way"—and they start to pull back and often completely step away from responsibility. Suddenly, we’re left doing it all alone.

And here’s the thing: frustration often leads to the blame game. We blow up, say things we don’t mean, and point fingers because we don’t know what’s causing the disconnect and how to fix it. We feel valid in our anger and overwhelm, and they feel like they’re right because we can never be satisfied. But in the end, we feel guilty for what we said out of frustration, and so does our partner. We’re both left with a heavy feeling and no idea how to make it right.

Action Items:

• Give your partner space to lead. Step back from taking control and allow him to show up. Trust that he’s capable.

• Reframe your expectations. Instead of focusing on perfection, celebrate the small efforts your partner makes.

• Break the cycle of blaming. When frustration arises, take a moment to reflect before reacting. Ask yourself, “What do I need right now and how can I express myself clearly with calmer emotion?” rather than immediately pointing fingers.

• Apologize from the heart. When things get heated, take responsibility for your own feelings and actions. A sincere apology can rebuild trust and connection.

• Embrace vulnerability. This is hard because it means letting go of control. And control is often attached to childhood wounds that cause us to operate in ways that make us feel safe and secure. But we have to give up some of that fierce independence because it only exacerbates the disconnect. It’s counterintuitive but true. The only way we can do this is by opening up about your true feelings with your partner. Share your frustrations with love and understanding, not blame. Being vulnerable allows both of you to step into the conversation authentically.

The Importance of Feminine Energy: Embracing the Beauty of Surrender

Before we move on, let’s pause and reflect on the true power of feminine energy. We live in a world that often values action, control, and doing, but what the world truly needs right now is the soft, nurturing, and intuitive energy that women bring. This is our authentic nature. Our feminine energy is a source of creation, of flow, and of connection. But here’s the thing—we often rob ourselves of being honored and taken care of because we’ve been conditioned to do it all.

When we constantly try to control and do it all, we miss out on the beauty of surrender. Surrender doesn’t mean weakness—it means trust, grace, and the ability to let go of the need to have it all figured out. There’s so much power in releasing control and allowing ourselves to be supported.

When I was in my 40s, I danced competitively in Latin dance, and I learned so much about letting go and trusting to experience the joy and fluidity in following. Think about partner dancing for a moment. When we dance, we surrender the lead to our male partner. We follow, and in doing so, we find so much ease. There’s a beautiful sense of safety and security that we reclaim when we let go of the reins. When we dance independently, we might feel free, but it’s often in that balanced partnership, in allowing the flow, that we find a deeper freedom. The same applies to our relationships. When we allow ourselves to surrender and trust our partner, we reclaim the beauty, the flow, and the freedom that we’ve been craving.

The Power of Balanced Partnership

The ultimate goal here is a return to true partnership. We need to balance our masculine and feminine energies—both within ourselves and in our relationships. The good news? It’s never too late to reconnect. To transform! When we stop trying to do it all and allow ourselves to be supported, that’s when magic happens. You don’t have to choose between being successful and having a strong, loving partnership. When you create space for both you and your partner to thrive in your natural roles, you let go of being right and reach for love—and that is the sweet spot where your relationship can truly blossom.

Action Items:

• Let go of control. Allow your partner to step into his role as protector and provider without micromanaging.

• Cultivate softness. Use your intuition and emotional intelligence to create a space of peace and understanding in your relationship. Ask yourself, “Would I feel happier if I let him take the lead right now?”

• Create a shared vision. Talk about your hopes for the future, what roles you each want to play, and how you can complement each other.

• Rediscover mutual support. Ask yourself how you can support your partner in a way that allows him to feel valued and empowered.

A Cherokee Proverb: Reclaiming True Partnership

I want to share a Cherokee proverb that I deeply believe in:"A woman’s highest calling is to lead a man to his soul, so as to unite him with Source. Her lowest calling is to seduce, separating man from his soul and leaving him aimlessly wandering. A man’s highest calling is to protect woman, so she is free to walk the earth unharmed."

This speaks to the core of what we’ve lost—true partnership. If we want to restore peace in our relationships, we must go back to honoring the innate strengths in each other. Men are providers by nature, and women are nurturers. Let’s stop competing for control and start collaborating.

Practical Takeaways:

• Rebalancing Your Energy: Take time each day to check in with yourself—are you leaning too much into masculine energy? What does your feminine side need from you right now?

• Healing the Disconnect: It’s not about changing who you are; it’s about honoring your strengths while creating space for your partner to show up and be strong in his own right.

• Nurturing Your Partnership: Whether you’re in a relationship or calling one in, focus on creating a partnership where both energies can exist harmoniously.

Affirmations:

1. “I am worthy of a balanced, supportive partnership where both my masculine and feminine energies can thrive.”

2. “I trust my partner to show up and take responsibility, just as I trust myself to lead with love and intuition.”

3. “I am open to creating space for true partnership, where both of our strengths are honored.”

Closing:

Thank you so much for being here today! Your time and energy mean the world to me. If this episode spoke to your heart, please follow or subscribe, leave a 5-star review, and share it with a friend who’s ready to find balance and connection. Oh, and don’t forget to grab your free Journal for Transformation and Self-Discovery from my website—you’ll love what’s in store. Plus, stay tuned because I’ve got a retreat this fall that you won’t want to miss!

I absolutely love hearing from you, so come find me on social media and share your thoughts—I’m always eager to connect. All the juicy details are in the show notes and on my website at www.lisaschoenthal.com.

With love from,Lis